Realised that it was due in little more than a week.
Decided, tonight, that it was about time to click the little 'submit' button.
Screamed my lungs out (with mum standing nervously beside me) as I submitted the application. Wreaked havoc in the house with my screams, Daddy rushed up asking what the commotion was about, Joel burst in to scold me for making so much noise and quickly paid the US$70 application fee to shut me up.
It's so ... final. This completely freaks me out. I can't believe my application is zooming electronically to Cornell at this moment. WHAT IF THEY READ IT AND CHUCK IT STRAIGHTAWAY.
Ok, breathe. (:
5 minutes later and I'm still trembly and panicky. I think I'm such a drama queen sometimes, haha.
Breathe again. (:
OH NO OH NO I SUBMITTED MY APPLICATION I CAN'T BELIEVE IT GOD HELP ME.
But really, there's nothing left to do but to leave it in His hands. I know my chances are so so so slim, everyone's been telling me not to get my hopes up too high, I know I have many other options, and while I know for a fact that there is a huge possibility that I won't get the place because it's so terribly competitive and prestigious, there's still that teensy little ray of hope I'm clutching on to, and I know very well that I'm going to be so so so crushed if I am rejected. Talking to Jerm some time ago reminded me once again how difficult it is to put everything in His hands and believe that no matter what the outcome, it is His plan, and His plan is to prosper and not to harm me, so what may seem devastating initially will ultimately lead to a more beautiful future for me. It's easy to know all that but when The Time comes and your dreams seem to shatter to pieces around your feet it's not easy to believe that He's going to piece everything back together again perfectly and make it bigger and better and brighter than before.
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Whew long paragraph.
Oh, but I must thank all the darlings who have been encouraging me so much so far. THANK YOU FRIENDS <3
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And to Shib and Sandhya: Don't say until like that lah so paiseh hahaha not gorges not gorges! But thank you for being sweet :D And Shib, remember GOURMET NETWORK?? Haha! We must revive that after the exams!! (Excessive punctuation means I'm excited!!)