31 December, 2005

January [under-the-waves]

1st Jan

Happy 2006, everybody (:

Party yesterday at Faith’s place with the 413 Mafia was great! Finally caught up with Su-e (I missed her!!) as well as other people ... Took many ridiculous photos (scandalous ones at that) but they’re mostly with Su-e, haha. We played our customary rounds of mafia, and played asshole taitee (renamed Ah Soh Taitee because of the presence of Faith’s little brother), ate a load of junk, counted down from 13 (Su-e, Faith and I stood screaming in the doorway though because we couldn’t rush out into the garden to join the rest in time), played with sparklers, took a lot of ridiculous photos, took a lot of pretty photos.

Not in chronological order.

It seems to have been a while since I’ve gone out and had fun with a huge bunch of girls only, and I didn’t realise I missed it until yesterday. Mm yeah.

Some photos:

Playing Mafia.



Su-E and I! <3



We tried to make a heart, it’s kinda warped but it’s not easy okay!



And of course, the customary shot everytime we play with sparklers:



Blessed 2006 to everyone!! :D

- - - - -

GASP. I just found out my Dad and Mum secretly snuck out to pak tor (ie. date)!! They went to watch Narnia at J8, leaving us 3 siblings to fend for ourselves at home.

Teeheehee XD


3rd Jan

And here is how I spent the first 3 days of 2006!

1st Jan:

Justin came over after church so we could complete our holiday homework together. Yes, sad but inevitable way to usher in the new year :P I think it’s a premonition of the year to come!

Halfway through I fell asleep. I was so sound asleep that when my sister clattered in to use her computer I didn’t even stir. Justin had to try 2 or 3 times to wake me up before I struggled out of bed. It’s nice waking up to hugs and kisses though (:

My mum and I forced him to stay over for dinner as usual, and after dinner my dad brought out some white wine because we have too many bottles of alcohol and this one was nearly 3 years old. And my brother’s an expert wine drinker – he even took wine classes! Taught us how to slllurrrp some air into your mouth with your wine and stuff ... mummy tried and choked instead. Hehehe.

Cheers!


After that, my sis drove Justin to the MRT station with my dad in the passenger seat ... and when we returned to our house, my dad let me drive the car!!! He says it’s not illegal because it’s not on a public road. -shrug-

The break and accelerator are shockingly sensitive ... a slight touch of the foot is enough to send you lurching. I drove up and down twice, but at the end I was blocking someone’s way to their carpark and I panicked so I hopped out and daddy quickly drove away. The woman came out of her car to look at me and giggled wildly as she said “OH you’re driving your daddy’s car issit?”

Quite exciting.


2nd Jan:

COOKIES GALORE.

Justin, together with his cute siblings Joshua and Christine, came over to my place at 10 in the morning. We immediately got started on making cinnamon cookies! Throughout the day, we made 6 batches of cookies, producing more than 200 cookies in total. Wheww.

Hard at work making the cookie dough:



All the hands involved! (Clockwise from bottom left – Christine, me, me, Joshua, Justin) Cutting out the Christmas trees:



Yes, we couldn’t find Christmas tree cookie cutters, so we resorted to doing it manually. Which took a hell lot of time and effort but it was worth it, because they produced the cutest Christmas tree cookies ever! :D



We even made special rugby cookies for the ruggers:



And ended off with what we called our ‘creative cookies’, haha!




1. Pre-baked creative cookie tray
2. Cockroaches! (By Joshua, Justin, Christine from left)
3. Four cookies placed together
(Face, shirt, pants, giant eye)
4. Pre-baked butterfly


They left at 4 ... that’s a LOT of baking! Hope you guys liked it ... a jar each for my class, my ex-class, Justin’s class, the ruggers, and random people. Really sorry if I didn’t see you and you didn’t get a cookie! ): Hope you guys liked it anyway (:

- - - - -

Teehee. I realise I still haven’t finished blogging about Korea yet :P

- - - - -


3rd Jan:

Today was the first day of school – We all felt rather “invaded” in a way by the swarms of new RGS and RI boys. The poor dears who aren’t from Raffles schools must be feeling rather intimidated. The canteen was in a cacophony of noise when I arrived in the morning, and to our horror we discovered the “rugby table” had been overrun by J1s! Everyone moved to the neighbouring table – ‘twas the Exodus of the Ruggers, sigh.

In other news, dear Liru’s not in class and I’m feeling rather ): about that. But nevermind, she has ordered Tubby to look after me in class while she’s away, yay! :D

We were plunged headlong into lectures and tutorials. It kinda sucks after 2 months of frivolity.

All the teachers are still the same (to our dismay, for some). Thankfully Ms GP has become much more jovial and humane ever since she became Mrs GP.

After school today, I got a spanking new file and notebook – I finally feel well-equipped and ready to face the new school year. Hoorah.

A levels, here I come!!


(Boo hoo.)


5th Jan

I know it is in their best intentions but still. It pains me to have my friends desert me on the grounds of “leaving the both of you alone”. It’s a sweet idea and all to give the both of us quality time together, I appreciate the thoughtfulness, but don’t forget that even I need my friends.

Justin and I spend time alone every weekend, and sometimes after school. School, however, is where I like to enjoy the company of friends. It’s just sad to see my friends leave a 2 metre radius around us, and we have to resort to sitting next to another couple to pour out similar woes to each other.

I appreciate your company more than your blessings of “quality time alone” with the boyfriend. Seriously. You won’t be intruding at all if you sit with us.

You ask, why don’t you just don’t sit with the boyfriend but with us instead? Well, it’s a vicious cycle. The more people shun us when we do sit together, the more unwelcome I feel and hence stay away, and that creates the illusion that I don’t want to socialise with anyone else. I guess I just have to be brave enough to barge in and join the rest, but I don’t even know if I’m welcome. (I suppose that’s the vicious cycle at work.)

Perhaps what B said eons ago holds some truth.

You know, it’s not always enough to know that there’s someone who loves you and will always be there.

Loneliness can hit you hard in the face even when the one you love is sitting right beside you.


I know some of you read this ... please don’t be offended or feel awkward around me now alright? (:


7th Jan

Part 1

Say, if I feel sad, and you feel sad,

But you think you feel sadder than me,

Does that give you the right to get pissed off and to tell me to quit complaining even though the only reason I started telling you about it was because you asked me about it?

Hey, I’m not stopping you from telling me your problems. I’m not telling you to quit complaining. God knows how many times I’ve tried to help. And I wanted to help.

You don’t know why you bother to talk to me at all? I know why I bother to talk to YOU. It’s because I care. (Present tense.) But if you don’t, and you tell me to bugger off, so be it.

Shrug. Don’t blame me.

But I’ll be here once you stop PMSing, or whatever you call the male equivalent of that. Because I value friendship.


PS to Huiwen: My tagboard doesn’t censor your name, yay (: And it’s ok, no need to say sorry, you wouldn’t have known!


Part 2

Wow. After literally hours of peering at the computer screen, I’ve finally completed the class T designs!!

The design on the back was a last minute decision and I’ll rather it not be there because I prefer the minimalistic look of the front design and nothing else ... But since they insisted I added everyone’s names (in register order) in the shape of a giant ‘Q’ on the back. Now it makes the shirt look more kiddy (in my opinion) and more class shirt-ish, but that could be a good thing I guess.

The back was terribly tedious because I had to manually rotate each letter/group of letters to make the whole thing look smooth. People with long names like SAMANTHA gave me the most headaches haha! LIRU’s (short) name is the best, awwyeah.

Anyway.

FRONT

Before (sketched on paper) and after (drawn on Photoshop)!





BACK

Before and after as well!





Really hope they like it ... -crosses fingers- Feedback/critique welcome!

Colours have yet to be decided on.


Part 3

Oho, perhaps it is time to resume blogging about Korea before I forget everything that happened! Haha. Long long overdue.

To continue where I last left off: This is my sister and I looking cool in our obiang ski suits hehehe XD (And yes XY I stayed at Yong Pyong too!!)



The rest of the tour group learnt how to ski ... but there was a disappointingly short period of time allocated for us to ski (about 3 or 4 hours only!) so my sister and I decided to go snowboarding instead. Since we know how to snowboard, we wouldn’t have to waste time learning how to. Snowboarding’s more expensive though, and we had to buy the tickets to take the ski lifts, but thank God the obliging parents paid for us (:

It was really really fun! I’ve improved from the first time I snowboarded in Canada ... I’ve nearly mastered the art of turning! The funny thing is, I’m what you call a ‘Goofy’. Meaning I turn naturally to my left, instead of turning to my right like the ‘Regular’s. And the snowboard’s made for ‘Regular’s so I logically have a harder time turning.

Another thing I discovered ... I turn strangely! Most people turn down the slope in ‘S’ shapes, whereas I go down in spirals. Haha! I didn’t realise I was doing it differently from most people, and my sister kept thinking I was spinning out of control, but actually I was doing it on purpose because I thought that was the right way of doing it.

Elisa and I had much much fun going down the Blue trail (BLUE LEH!! :D) about 5 or 6 times. Wheee. After my 10892652689th tumble, my butt and arms were aching so much though! But it was really really fun. Definitely the most fun part of the entire trip. (:

After snowboarding, Elisa and I discovered that we had the worst hat hair imaginable XD


We were sunburnt too! Hehe.

Day 5: We went to Everland, an amusement part. The temperature was about negative 15 that day, and even colder in the evening. Painfully freezing ... which kind of took away half the fun because everything just hurt from the cold! And the queues were crazy – sometimes, we had to wait about 40 minutes. Wah.

I happened to look down and realised that I was wearing black pink black pink black. Disgustingly matching don’t you think? Haha!



Here we are at Everland! The decorations and atmosphere was delightfully Christmassy. Cute Christmas songs were playing every second, and everyone was dressed up in Christmas gear or cute fluffy animal hats. Very very nice ambience (:



There were these funky rides where you insert a coin and sit on a giant furry animal, and you can drive it anywhere you want. Hehe. Just found that adorable.



First thing we went for – One of those 3D movie things where you wear 3D glasses and your seat shakes. Not terribly impressive. Elisa and I try our best to look cool in the dorky glasses XD (I realise we have the silliest photos ever.)



After that we queued up for ages and ages, only to whizz down a snow slope on a bright yellow float-like thing within 15 seconds! It was terribly fun though and my mum, sis and I hollered all the way down (I could hear them screaming beside me) because it was shockingly fast!



It was really funny watching my dad zooming down the slope on his little yellow float, because how often do you get to see your dad looking so cute and little-boyish?



We went into a shop for the sole purpose of warming ourselves up. We found lots of animal hats and matching animal mittens! Everyone was wearing those, yes, even the adults. Charming. Here’s my dad (with tiger claws) trying to shred me (the fluffy lamb) to pieces!! (Check out Daddy’s face hahaha priceless)



We walked around a little and got pretty lost ... and we were miserably freezing our asses off ... so we decided to hop into the next ride we came to, which happened to be this “spooky” mansion thing where you sit on a moving platform and shoot ghosts with a gun. Here’s me waiting in queue looking terribly FAT and cold.



After that, Elisa and I plucked up our courage and decided to go on a rollercoaster ride!! Daddy obligingly tagged along but Mummy didn’t dare, hehe. It had a double loop-the-loop and a corkscrew after that! The scariest part of the ride though was the steep drop at the beginning. I screamed my lungs out throughout the ride – and I do mean throughout - I was screaming even before we started moving hahaha. Very very exciting.



Like most rollercoasters, they snapped photos of everyone on the ride – Elisa and I were caught unaware and in the photo, I am clutching on with a death grip and screaming, while Elisa is clutching on with a death grip but looking like she’s asleep. Here’s a photo of the photo :P



We only had a little time left so we toured the gift shops and saw funny things like keychain pigs with metallic snouts kissing.



We went to the entrance to wait for the rest ... We would have died if we hadn’t found a heater to huddle around like penguins! That’s my tour guide next to Elisa (: She’s such a dear!



That night, we went to eat the famous Korean ginseng chicken ... Quite cool because everyone gets an entire chicken (it’s a small one) that’s stuffed with rice! It was nice and filling and didn’t taste much of ginseng (thank goodness haha).



We went to this shopping center called “dootah” or something like that. It was really crowded and everything was terribly ah lian-ish, and it was full of imitation branded goods. Not quite my style. We wandered around aimlessly and didn’t buy a thing, and marvelled at our fellow tour group friends who returned with handfuls of plastic bags. O.o This is the mall:



We spent the night in a hotel room with the strangest toilet door ever – you could look right in. And the toilet bowl’s facing the door. Meaning to say, when you sit there and poo anyone who walks past can watch you poo. WEIRD.



Ok end of Day 5, still got a few more days to update about hehe!

- - - - -

Church tomorrow with Justin and his family, first time in months! And homework to complete now.

I never make New Year’s resolutions, I just remind myself that I ought to do this and that throughout the year, but just for the sake of making New Year’s resolutions (7 days late):

1. Love my Daddy in heaven (: and keep trusting Him to provide
2. Love my family and friends ...
3. ... and show them that I do!
4. No hating, no bearing grudges
5. Be consistent in my studies throughout the year (consistently GOOD that is)
6. Keep dancing dancing dancing!
7. Realise what I want to do in the future :8. Tone down on the insecurities ...
9. and tone up on the muscles :P
10. Share the joys of tampons to all menstruating girls

I’m not kidding about #10, you know (though it’s completely random). I’ve been using those for ages and they’re truly my life saviours. TAMPONS! <3 Ask me if you need help!

- - - - -

Third time I’m updating today, goodness! 3Q people who see this go look at the class tee designs! (:


8th Jan

Today, I ...

- Wore my first ever red skirt, and first ever knee length (!!) skirt (not including school uniforms because those don’t count) (knee length!! I’m growing up!!)



- Combed my eyelashes because they looked unruly (ooh, spot the eye wrinkles)



- Went to Justin’s church and realised his mummy, Christine and I were all wearing red and black

- Watched Justin eat 2 packets of noodles, 1 packet of nasi lemak and half a circular-white-noodley-thing-with-orange-sugar-sprinkled-on-top for breakfast

- Listened to a rather boring sermon

- Shared porridge and dumplings and ice kachang at Maxwell’s

- Watched Narnia at Suntec (THE BEAVERS ARE THE CUTEST EVER <3)

- Helped Justin choose 2 long-sleeved shirts (40% and 30% discount :D, totalled $90.40!)

- Shared smoked salmon pasta and baked pasta

- Took an MRT back to AMK and got sent back home by Justin’s mummy

And that’s how we spent yet another month-nivarsary (: Like I told XY (thanks for remembering every single time dear!!), it was nothing extravagant but everyday spent with the boyfriend is special.

<3

Mm. Love you.


10th Jan

Part 1

I seem to have an uncanny ability to unearth troubles/complains from guys who hadn’t intended to even start talking to me about them in the first place. I feel like Aunt Agony minus the helpful advice :P

I’m not grumbling of course, I love to lend a listening ear and hope fervently that even if I have nothing worthy to advise, their burden will be lightened no matter how infinitesimally, if at all. That’s what friends are for, right? (: I try my best.

Also talking to D for the first time in ages last night reminded me why I used to talk to him every night when I was younger. That guy simply exudes sunbeams and happiness from his pores! Every single time we talk, whether it’s during the hols or in the middle of a stressful school term, he’s always having a blast. “I’m just so high on happiness and I don’t know why!” So rare to find happy people like that nowadays ... it’s such a joy to be around him.

Some people sail through life without a hitch, others are just so problematic. Does it have to do with your outlook, or does it have to do with the inevitable circumstances life sometimes plunges you into? I’m not sure.

I guess for me, I just have to learn to rely on the Lord more ... Self-effort is so limited! And when we find rest in Him, He will command His blessings abundantly unto us! Mm. God’s the bestest, awwyeahh :D


Part 2

Rainbow colours to choose from.



Pink and purple are really pretty right? Why are the guys in class so UNCOOL and refuse to agree with the girls? :P Hehe ok kidding.

We’ll never come to a compromise ... Some people will always be unhappy with the colour. So tricky, hmm.


[Later that day ...]

After a yummy dinner of baked chicken and red wine, the family minus Joel decided out of the blue to dig the mouldy (literally) Scrabble board out from the cupboard.


Round 1: Daddy 199, Elisa 120, Evelyn 106, Mummy 81.

Daddy won because of a marvellous score of 71 with ‘learner’ because when you use up all your tiles at once, you get 50 points bonus. Evelyn didn’t do very well because she had all the gross letters like J and X and Y and W.


Round 2: Evelyn 201, Elisa 133, Daddy 97, Mummy 49.

Evelyn won because of a score of 45 with ‘floors’ and ‘duets’ at the same time, with a triple word tile. Daddy didn’t do very well because he had only vowels and had to make words like ‘poo’. Elisa tried to put ‘poot’ but we didn’t let her.


Conclusion: Evelyn is the Scrabble Queen.

-beams-


12th Jan

Yesterday, sitting in the canteen with Liru, Bryan, Tubby and later Justin and speaking using the most ostentatious and superfluous vocabulary was far from insipid. While our conversation would have been deemed esoteric by the less astute, it did add levity to what would otherwise have been mundane. Studying for SATs was more prolific that I thought it would have been!

- - - - -

That aside, CCA fest bored me to death. I sat at the gymnastics booth knowing that non-gymnasts wouldn’t even cast a second glance at us. Quite a number of people signed up for recre-gym though, but because of the silly new rule (only 1 sports CCA) I doubt many would end up joining. Got to see Melissa Gerry Zhixu Aster and Yihui though, it’ll be fun training with them again (:

- - - - -

Chingay after that was wearisome and dusty. And to make things worse, I had a grumpy partner ): (Just kidding Just :P) Laoshi has changed the dance umpteen times and we’re all just so tired. It doesn’t help that I feel absolutely unglamorous waving my arms about like jellyfish tentacles while swaying my bum (only people like Hide make it look sexy) and doing silly stuff like skipping and snapping my fingers.

Chingay prac tomorrow from 5 to 7, Saturday from 9 to 12, Sunday from 4 to 6 (?) at People’s Association, Wednesday at PA again, 21st Jan from 4 to 11 pm ... Aiyah can’t remember lah.

But at least it’s been quite an experience, and while I’m dancing, it’s usually fun (: It’s mostly the waiting around that gets me tired.

- - - - -

While waiting for Daddy to pick me up after Chingay (because it was raining), a herd of RI boys were walking down the (wet) steps from the parade square. And to my dismay (and secret amusement) I watched 3 boys slip and fall down the last step, within about 5 minutes. It was like deja vu because each time, they slipped and thumped down onto the step at the exact same spot, and the entire group of boys would roar “OHHHhhhahaha”, heave the poor soggy boy back to his feet and trot off again.

- - - - -

The weather’s been perpetually aircon-like, which is both good and bad. Good because it’s better than sweating, bad because it’s wet. It reminds me of Vancouver because you never see the sun nowadays! I’m pretty content despite the gloomy grey skies, because I know I’ll complain even more if it were scorching, stickily hot.

I hope it snows tomorrow. (HAHA who knows!! Ok fine, it won’t.)

- - - - -

Nearly 2 weeks of school are over. Lecturers are speeding and it’s hard to keep up. Everyday feels like a Friday because I’m so exhausted – Gone are the days when I could sleep at 2 and wake up at 6. Nowadays, I can sleep at 11 and still wake up tired. Help, I’m aging!

But one thing never fails to keep me ploughing on in school -

“Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.”

- Isa 40:30-31


(: Yup, that’s what keeps me going.


13th Jan

You’ll never know really, how concerned I was. It was gnawing at me for days. I wasn’t blaming you for anything, I wasn’t blaming you for scaring me half to death, I was letting you know because all that resulted from my concern for you.

It hurts me so, so much to know that someone whom I genuinely care for always appears to hate me so deeply. And the fact that you dismiss my friendship for something much, much less. Sometimes the things you say or do make me shed tears secretly when noone’s looking, and make me wonder why the hell I still bother. I don’t know why but I do anyway. Perhaps unlike you, I can’t deny the fact that once I enjoyed your company and appreciated your friendship.

Oh yeah, and I’m SO sorry I don’t know what “noru sarang nay” means, because it makes SO much sense that I should understand Korean because I’m pure Chinese, doesn’t it? If you want to know, I tried Babelfish but without the Korean characters it was impossible to translate. And don’t blame me for not knowing when you didn’t bother explaining when I asked.

Your friendship means something to me, even if it doesn’t to you. So please stop the false accusations and hurtful words. The past few days have been miserable but I’m always hoping we can someday return to how things were like a few months ago.

Perhaps I shouldn’t try so hard. After all, you seem to enjoy hurting me, so perhaps I’ll just stop fighting back and let you do whatever you want.


Friday the 13th sucks.


But no day is ever completely bad – Spent much time with Liru <3 during and after school, had a pretty fun albeit confusing and mosquito-infested Chingay prac, had dinner with the boyfriend.

Seems like my Friday the 13th began and ended on a bad note. Trust me, flinging worksheets at people is definitely not common behaviour for me.

Thank God for Justin, who’ll never turn his back on me like that, who’ll never doubt my love and care, who’ll never hurt me intentionally, who’ll never stop loving me. Thank God for at least that one constant in my life.


God, give me the strength and wisdom to overcome my circumstances, to fight back the anger, to forgive, to love. My state of mind is truly disappointing. Help me to be more like You.


14th Jan

Modern pointe for dance night. Interesting proposition, considering there aren’t that many of us who can do pointe, and out of those of us who can, few are very good. And modern pointe is going to be even more difficult than classical ballet en pointe, I believe.

But it’ll be lovely if we could make it work.

I miss pointe! The last time I did it was last May:



- - - - -

Chingay was tiring and I was partnerless, but we finally finished the dance! Happyhappyjoyjoy.

Now we’ll just have to see if I’ll remember all the steps tomorrow at Kallang.

And we’ll get to see our costumes on Tuesday – If we’re going bra-less our boobs are going to bouncebouncebounce, so nasty!! (Pardon the imagery.) But what to do if your costume’s low back? Any clever solutions for me? Oh no oh no oh no.


17th Jan

The Chingay costumes are ... I don’t know how to describe them. Suffice to say, you won’t be able to look at us with a straight face.

Tried out the costumes in the dance studio after my crazy long day (which ended at 5) ... the Latin costume couldn’t possibly be any further from what a Latin costume should be like – it’s gold and neon orange, puffy, tiered like a wedding cake, absolutely shapeless, and have these terrible seashell shaped things sort of covering our boobs. WEIRD.

Thank goodness we have guy partners who look pretty much as hideous as us, with (very tight hahaha) jeans, a waiter-ish white shirt, yellow flowery bangle thingies around their wrists, a shiny cowboy hat, and the worst yet: a ridiculous padded blue and gold coat with long shirt tails. HAHA. Not exactly very sexy.

The other 3 items’ costumes are pretty laughable too – neon pink bouncy wire skirts, green fluff balls, and a black dress with jingling strips of silver pieces hanging down. But quite cute lah I guess, and definitely entertaining/eyecatching, if you want to look on the bright side.

Hehehe what a sight. We created such a din trying on the costumes and laughing at ourselves and each other. I nearly died from laughing when Leslie discovered his jeans were so tight that he could neither buckle them nor bend his knees past a certain degree.

Shall take photos during the full dress on Saturday, perhaps!

Hilarious, but not so much when you realise we’re going to humiliate ourselves on national TV. Heh, heh.


19th Jan

I should have known – consecutive late nights and days of continual exertion would have got me sick.

Yesterday’s auditions were exceptionally tiring because as a ‘teacher’ I had to dance the dance so many times from 1 something to near 5 and yell really loud because noone would hear me over the din otherwise. And after that, we went down to Kallang until 9 pm for a Chingay rehearsal where I was dressed up as a golden cupcake and danced in the light drizzle for a while. We also discovered that in order to promote Singapore singers, the organisers chopped half our original song away and replaced it with an incongruous Sun Yanzi song. Ugh.

Thankfully, I think Wanjun managed to persuade the tailors to alter our costumes slightly – make them shorter and remove the seashell boob thingies. But I don’t think the tailors are very pleased.

Poor laoshi was trying to psych us up yesterday because there were important people watching us, but with clogged nasal passages and no partner to even grin at (because it feels silly grinning at an imaginary person by my side) I suspect I looked more constipated than ecstatic. Ah well, hopefully Saturday’s full dress will be better (: And anyway, with the inundation of garish costumes all around, how to not grin? Haha.

So today, I woke up at 8 because I can’t help waking up early, had a bit of breakfast, and started on the thick pile of SAT books my dad got for me.


One week left and I haven’t even tried any practice papers. I’m so unprepared despite the daily dose of cheem vocab words that Liru and I try to digest. Gulp. (But notice I’ve been trying to sprinkle SAT words in this entry? :D)

Couldn’t tahan after an hour or so, also perhaps because of sleep-inducing medication, so I flopped onto my parents’ bed and fell asleep until 12. And in my sleep I had a very disquieting nightmare about Ms GP waking me from my slumber and yelling at me for falling ill and not turning up in school. Bleugh.

And speaking of disquieting (sorry, my thoughts are flitting from topic to topic) Evelyn let me listen to a nice song last night and I had to check up the lyrics. It was just so disturbing to know that the lyrics were English but all I could understand was something like “yeeenonolelililiyeetooyewww” and “noooooootwill nooooocheeeeull bushybites my siren”. Um, yeah something like that. Turns out it’s actually “and you know you're gonna lie to you” and “know too well, know the chill, know she breaks my siren” respectively.

Haha go listen to the song and you’ll understand why I felt so disturbed.

Siren – Tori Amos

And you know you're gonna lie to you
In your own way
And you know you're gonna lie to you
In your own way

And I lie some other day
You do
And you say girl
Know too well
Know the chill
Know she breaks
My siren
Know teenage flesh
Know the chill
Know she breaks
My siren

Never was one for a prissy girl
Coquette call in for an ambulance
Reach high, doesn't mean she's holy
Just means she's got a cellular handy
Almost brave, almost pregnant
Almost in love
Vanilla
Vanilla


What a difficult song to interpret.


20th Jan

Part 1

What to do, when you matter so much to someone but he simply doesn’t matter that much to you?

What to do, when someone’s so smitten with you but you treat him even less than a normal friend?

What to do, when you want to be a good friend but you can’t bring yourself to reciprocate?

Help, I don’t know what to do with him.


Part 2

Went to school feeling slight effects of yesterday’s flu and was greeted by 2 hours of GP (wrote a rubbishy essay), 2 hours of Chem prac, break, and 2 hours of Bio prac. Not fun.

But thanks for the kind words and well wishes (: I’m fine now.

And just for the sake of never forgetting how disastrous the Chingay costume was, I took a photo of it before alteration today! Thankfully I brought my camera, or I would never have a record of the Original Golden Cupcake.

To jog your memory of what I said it looked like:

“... it’s gold and neon orange, puffy, tiered like a wedding cake, absolutely shapeless, and have these terrible seashell shaped things sort of covering our boobs.”

Well, I don’t know what you pictured it to be, but here it is!!

Feel free to laugh your head off at the ugliest costume ever sewn because I can’t stop laughing at how idiotic I look in it either.

Hehehe XD



Told you it was bad.

We’re going to flip the top tier up to hide the seashells, put something around our waist to show we actually have waists, and shorten it drastically to show that we actually have legs. I’m not sure if it’ll ever look good no matter how we alter it, but anything would be better than this! :P

Dance night auditions tomorrow, and then full dress rehearsal with our safety pinned costumes (we haven’t had time to send them to the tailor yet).

Sorry Tubby for missing the party ): Really wish I didn’t have to miss it. Do enjoy yourself!!


21st Jan

Today was the longest, tiring-est day ever. I have a bio test on Monday, and I haven’t touched my notes (5 min in the dance studio today doesn’t count), and I’m going to church tomorrow, and I really should go get some sleep.

But I’m waiting for the boyfriend to return home from Tubby’s party and I don’t feel like studying (though I really really really ought to) so here I am.

Got to know the new dance J1s a little better this morning (congrats to all!) and watched snippets from all the dance night items. Auditions were a tiring affair, and I doubt I’ll get into anything which is sad ):

A quick lunch in the hall, followed by running through Chingay once or twice, going to change into nice fresh bras (haha) with Cheryl, changing into slightly-less-hideous costumes, putting on makeup in a frenzy ...

And speaking of makeup, my eye makeup was amazingly thick, so much so that some people thought my lashes were fake. (They weren’t!) Hehe, thanks Mummy and Daddy for the big eyes and long lashes and foldy eyelids (: Check out the glittery eye makeup and ‘fake’ eyelashes!



We rushed off to Kallang and to our horror, discovered we had to wear boots with crazy high heels, which so does not go with our costume. Until now my poor feet are going throbthrobthrob from the perpetual tiptoeing and pressure on the soles.

Dinner was a miserable affair – I don’t think I ate even a quarter of my food because everything (except the cauliflower!) tasted icky.

We were hurried off onto the road soon after to wait our turn. I don’t know why we were so rushed because in the end, we spent ages and ages just standing there. My feet nearly killed me, and so did the exhaust from the floats.

And finally when it was our turn to dance – It started pouring with rain. Sigh. Ran off into the shelter once it started getting heavier and I would have frozen to death if not for Just’s hideous (but toasty warm) coat. Thank you, so sweet (: Prayed a little prayer with Sarah for the rain to stop and it did soon after, yay (:

So. It was finally our turn ... and the first thing we did was to mess up big time by missing the correct count. Our side was doing the moves to the correct counts but we were different from the other side, eek.

And while doing the aeroplane drop, something disastrous happened that made me lose my cool and so I was completely hysterical throughout the rest of the dance. Hahaha. Don’t worry Just, I was more amused than anything, and I was just hoping fervently that noone saw what happened. XD

And then, the float was slow so we couldn’t get to our positions in time. Just and I ended up sticking out of the entire formation by a few metres which must have looked quite bad.

And basically throughout the dance I was mostly stumbling around because of the boots and dissolving into giggles because I was hysterical.

Ahaha. All in all the most disastrous dance ever, but actually it was quite fun teeheehee :D As long as it doesn’t happen during Chingay itself.

Thanks Just, it was great dancing with you today! (:

Now to sit tight and wait for Justin to call. (:


22nd Jan

Justin turned up at my place early this morning bearing CNY goodies from his mum to my family, yum! His family is forever showering me with gifts, very paiseh.

We bussed down to Suntec for lunch and then church. (And tried to do some studying in between but I don’t think I really learnt anything.) Oh yeah and before church there was this Chinese acrobatic showcase, which I (of course) stopped to watch. There were these 2 contortionists who weren’t that flexible but were very strong and had fabulous balance. I think a few of us in gym are even more flexible than them but I could only wish I were that strong!

We rushed up to the Rock immediately after but had to go to the overflow room instead, oops.

Pastor Mark (the Hokkien pastor) was preaching today, and his sense of humour and energy and cutely choppy English made an extremely entertaining service. Everyone was practically giggling throughout (like when he pronounced Ecclesiastes as something like assesseessteess and had to spell it out in the end), but the message was definitely powerful, and 6 people in that service accepted Christ, yay :D

My favourite verse from today’s sermon!

“ ... In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33



Random comment #1: I wore a big floofy ankle-length skirt for the first time in my life today. It’s hard to climb stairs with big floofy ankle-length skirts, but other than that I thought it was quite pretty (despite the fact that bohemian is so last season)!

Random comment #2: Vestiges of yesterday’s eye makeup were still precipitating and floating about in my eyes today. Ew.

Yeah anyway.

Justin came over after church for a bit to pick up some stuff, Mummy drove him halfway home, I had dinner and discussed my business venture with the family, had a bath, and here I am, and ... off I go.

Bio bio bio, yucky.


24th Jan

3 more days to doom (ie. SATs). Pugnacious, dilatory, ebullience, malfeasance. Just a few of the vocab words I memorised today.

For now, the most worrying part appears to be the essay – Because you need a wide knowledge of history and literature, of which I have none. I guess I ought to have started preparing much earlier, sigh.

- - - - -

Learning journeys at Chinatown today, supposedly. We popped by URA where Liru and I ambled aimlessly in a corner, and then walked to see a temple but got lost instead. Walked a humongous round and ended up at the URA building again, gave up on the temple and went off to Chinatown, whereupon we were dismissed and I hurried off to the MRT station with Siyuan (who is more than one escalator step taller than me).

At the AMK station, while waiting for Daddy and Joel to pick me up, I bought 3 packets of tissue from a wheelchair bound aunty singing her lungs out and felt happy for making someone smile (:

- - - - -

Seriously, you can’t expect me to fall for that again. It irks me to think that you think I’m so gullible. Like I said over the heads of our classmates just now, I’m not that dumb.

On my birthday last year, you told me something. A few days later you told me it was a joke. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and laughed it off.

Then you did the same to another girl.

Then you told me the same thing again late last year and within the same night, you said it was a joke.

And the next day you said it wasn’t a joke and you meant it.

And today you try to convince me it was a joke all over again.

Even a dumbass wouldn’t fall for the same trick three times. Really, it’s cowardly to try to take back everything you wish you hadn’t said by disguising it as a ‘joke’. You may hate me at this moment, that’s fine with me, but don’t try to pretend it never happened and try to turn things around to spite me.

- - - - -

But thank God for good friends who make my life so much better. I’ve managed to stay pretty cheerful despite all that’s happened.

Thanks dearest Liru for being with me today (even though you will never read this), you’ve really been a source of strength for the past year or so. Seriously, I really don’t know how I would get by in or out of class without you! Much love. (:

And thanks to my bestest buddy Justin for being always understanding, forever loving, and 100% dependable. Sometimes circumstances really make me realise that I take your integrity and reliability for granted. God has really blessed me with you! BIIIG thank you for being here for me all the time. Love you muchly! <3

And of course thanks to my Daddy in heaven ... just knowing Someone up there in my heart is watching out for me makes me heave a sigh of relief, because I know everything will sort itself out in due time. Yeah. Everything will.


26th Jan

L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore

Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don't break it
Love was made for me and you


Yay! <3 What an adorable song.

(Thanks Tubby for introducing it to us in the canteen haha!)

- - - - -

Congrats ruggers! It was fun watching you guys play today (:

And thanks Just for keeping me company and attempting to explain the game! Now I know a little more about rugby than the fact that you must pass the ball backwards and pile up on each other. Hehehe.

And thanks Justin for the cozy little hawker centre dinner (: And for introducing me to meepok! I think it was my first time eating meepok, hahaha, and I call myself Singaporean. So shameful.

And since I’m on a thanking spree, much thanks to dearest Gerry for randomly pouncing on me in the toilet and presenting me with a lovely plastic $2 note!! Lovely.



I’m keeping it in my drawer and remember you when I look at it! Hehehe XD

- - - - -

And because I woke up to an SMS that nearly sent angry puffs of steam streaming out of my ears ... I actually sat down this morning before school and typed out a very angry post but didn’t post it because I don’t like to sound so angry.

I’m actually pretty cheerful now, just that when I think about it, I tend to get pissed off. Apart from that I’m perfectly fine, thanks to all those who asked (:

And just for the record, here’s what I typed out this morning.

Haha nice try again.

You say sorry, but you find it extremely amusing and fun to try to “play” me. You say you’re not seeking forgiveness or friendship because you need neither. If you’re obviously not sorry for what you did, nor do you even want to be forgiven for saying sorry, then what’s the point?

It’s not as if I can’t see through what you did, any simpleton can figure it out for himself. You tried to win me over and “steal” me away from Justin three times. Each time, when it was evident that I remained 100% in love with my boyfriend and you failed to get me, you tried to turn things around by saying that you never liked me, but you were just playing around with me and you found it marvellous fun and it made you feel really good.

At least you’ve told me you don’t mind the world knowing because they will only see how naïve I was. Hahaha. I definitely don’t mind the world knowing because I know I did nothing wrong. I’ve only been keeping quiet about it because I didn’t quite want to ruin your reputation. I suppose there’s nothing wrong now because like you pointed out yourself, you never had a reputation to begin with.

As if those were ‘jokes’. You’re simply irresponsible for any of your words or actions, and you’re only trying to take the easy way out by pretending that you were tricking me all along. Maybe you don’t like me now, I’m perfectly fine with that, but I’m not fine with you trying to redeem yourself and keep your pride intact somehow by making me feel as though I’ve been played. Because I know I haven’t.

Trying to play games like that is pathetic. Get a life, Emerson.


Told you it was angsty. Oh well. As long as I know I have caring friends and a loving boyfriend who will always stand by me ... I’ll be fine. (:

I forgive, but I don’t forget. And I don’t want to forget. What’s the point of forgetting, you’ll never be able to learn any lessons that way.

- - - - -

And lastly to Vivian: YAY if you spot me make sure you scream my name really loudly so I’ll see you alright? (:


27th Jan

MyHeritage - Check it out! I really ought to be mugging for SATs but I got distracted. It’s the coolest technology ever! The site uploads your photo and churns out celebrity photos it thinks matches your features.

Try it, it’s really funny!

I tried Justin first. When I saw Keanu Reeves, I was like HMM not bad not bad. And then I scrolled on and nearly split my sides laughing XD



And then I tried one of my (not too flattering) photos ...


... which wasn’t very interesting, so I tried another photo, and nearly peed in my pants when I saw the face that turned up.




HAHAHA do you see the resemblance?? I’m certain it’s the nose!! XD

Oh my goodness I’m so amused.


28th Jan

No more SATs! Till May, at least, if I choose to retake it. ): Yeah, it wasn’t too great – I didn’t finish my essay and that pretty much shook me up for the rest of the paper.

Nevermind, I’ll just trust God and see what happens when I get my results back. For now, I’ve got to catch up on all the work I’ve been sacrificing for studying for SATs!

- - - - -

After SATs at ACJC, we MRTed down to City Hall and celebrated the end of the SATs with beef noodles and some aimless shopping on my part. Didn’t buy anything, as usual, being the fastidious shopper I am, and besides I was too lazy to try on anything.

Beef noodles, which I thought looked scrumptious:



Lost my steam quickly and ended up dozing off on Justin’s shoulder/tummy/lap (I think I slid downwards) on the MRT ride home.

Leaped into bed immediately once I got home, slept for half an hour or so, and then had to go downstairs for “reunion dinner”. (In inverted commas because it was just steamboat with the usual family members – all the rest of my relatives are in Malaysia.) Ate way too much, downed 2 different types of red wine, lamented over the fact that everything consumed today probably made me 5 kg heavier.

Anyway! A couple more random photos from today ...

My favourite part of my bag – Butterfly! (: (: (:



And my post-French-braided hair. I much prefer wavy hair to ramrod straight hair! Perhaps one day, I shall go for a perm, oohlala.



Ahh, thank God for the long weekend. I really need to recuperate from everything that’s been stressing me out these few days!


PS: Thanks to everybody for your SMSes/well wishes for SATs! Really much appreciated (:

PPS to Ethel: Aww thanks, but why would you admire ME? Hehe!

PPPS to Sandhya: Well, what did yours come out as! My sister apparently looked like this old bearded man and she wasn’t too thrilled. Hehehe.



29th Jan

I planned to make today a mugging day and hence ‘pang seh’ed Des and now I feel quite bad because I just awoke from a (lovely nonetheless) 4 hour slumber.

My sister and I have been slaving the entire day over our little ‘cottage industry’ and we’re just about breaking even – one more sale and we’ll start reaping in the profits. Hoho! Once our website’s up and running (well, it is, but it’s not perfected yet) I’ll post it here (: I have to say, it’s the cutest website ever and I’m so proud of us!

A taster of what’s to come:


Cute? :D

- - - - -

I’m not going visiting again this year, and I’m thoroughly glad. I don’t really like Chinese New Year, which is something I think about every year, it seems.

Last year I wrote: “It’s that time of the year again. Where everything’s bathed in a gaudy mishmash of reds and golds, the same [annoying] oriental tunes play over and over again, CNY goodies tempt you from every corner, and kids and teens alike brag about how much angpao money they received this year.”

Same old, same old. Some things never change.

The only vaguely Chinese-y thing my family does on CNY is to have steamboat and eat Mandarin oranges. Apart from that, we kids stopped visiting years ago, and this year the number of families to visit has dwindled to one. My parents will be popping by their place tomorrow and that’ll be the end of the festivities for us.

Oh but how could I forget about the ang paos? I’ve got 3 from my parents and granny for just sitting here the entire day. Hehe.


I’m not quite expecting any more save one or two, but that’s okay, because every year our ang pao money adds up to way less than $100 (excluding the ang paos from parents/granny). I’m not complaining though! It doesn’t matter to me.

But sometimes, deep inside my Chinese heart, I kinda wish for the day when I’m married and have a gazillion relatives living in Singapore, both old and young, and we’ll organise boisterous reunion dinners and toss out bursting ang paos to happy kids and catch up with the people who matter the most and holler GONGXIFACAI at each other over the din.


30th Jan

Time to be thick-skinned and post up the site my sister and I have been working on here ...

Visit our online store at http://www.fluidskies.com/elisa_and_evelyn! :D We sell (homemade) bags and earrings!

Even if you don’t intend to buy anything check it out anyway because I spent the whole of yesterday hand-drawing everything and photoshopping and my sister laboured into the wee hours of the night to put it all together. Click on the images on the site because they’re links, and tell me if anything doesn’t work, hehe.

(And tell your friends about us, of course! :D)


31st Jan

I watched some Latin and Ballroom dance competitions just the other day (thanks to Desmond for the tip)! It was really good and this particular couple caught my eye – Stefano and Annalisa Di Filippo.



Same surname! So I initially figured they were married, and was gushing on about how charming that was. Then the commentator mentioned that they were brother and sister.

Hm.



They’re lovely to watch, no doubt, ranked one of the top in the world. But it was just kinda weird because in Latin, you’re supposed to have chemistry with your partner and I can’t imagine dancing with my brother and having to pretend I’m romantically in love with him! Cough shudder wince.

But on the other hand, it’ll be brilliant to have a sibling who shares a common passion! Imagine how fun it’ll be to be able to randomly chachacha your way to the dining table together with your brother.



Gorgeous.

At least my brother knows how to do tap and jazz, and my sister took some basic Latin classes, and my mummy learnt ballroom once upon a time, (daddy doesn’t like it though), and the boyfriend can do the lindyhop with me, and I think that’s super duper funky and I don’t need to wish for more (: