*1319 - growing old

I recognize all the huge changes in myself over the years and am thankful.  I can guess at what could be happening in a couple of parallel universes--it could be more awesome, it could be devastatingly worse.  But where I am right now.  I am just thankful.

A younger me would have once thought crossing the line into "late 20's" would reflect a very different lifestyle than "early 20's".  Sure, materially, things have changed.  I work, I pay all my own bills, I subsist completely on my own, I don't depend on anyone.  I can afford tiny luxuries like trips to Hawaii and the occasional Michelin-rated restaurant and more shoes than I objectively require.  Sure, maturity has grown, thank God.  I understand myself and have learnt to accept myself or accept my process to accepting myself.  Sure, I have discovered new hobbies, have a different mix of friends, do different things to entertain or improve myself, have different goals and objectives.  Sure, I have new worries and new priorities that occupy my mind that didn't use to.

But one thing that would probably have surprises me, because it surprises me today and makes me giggle, is all that talk about getting jaded?  Tapering off?  Mellowing?  Settling?  Not having as much fun?  That is so far from the truth!  I look at my older friends in their 30's and 40's and I only hope I can be as cool and fun-loving as them when I am there.  (Everyone in San Franciso has a slight streak of crazy, though, so perhaps my perceptions are skewed.)

What I'm saying, I guess, is that a passion, a passion for passion, a wonder for life, and active pursuit of adventure and newness and excitement--I don't think this has to wane.  Sometimes, I catch myself laughing at myself, because I realise (happily) that some things don't change and don't have to change.