*1283 - tipping point

Mind over matter.  Sometimes that is all it takes--a big bludgeon that makes your head swim, knees collapse, and eyes water, and then picking yourself up and seeing things from a different perspective.  That bludgeon didn't make sense, it wasn't fair, whatever, put it behind you and figure out the strategy that gives you the most peace.  I've found my peace, I'm not doing anything differently outwardly, but it's all about how you process it in your mind.  You can look at it as a debilitating strike or you can look at it as an opportunity.

*1282 - croissant vs. tiramisu

*1281 - blind

The bitter irony of removing your contacts and then searching around blindly for your glasses.

*1280 - neither here nor there

Ironically here in the middle of Arkansas, through a colleague's colleague's colleague I found myself invited to a dinner table-ful of Chinese girls (not what I was expecting when I turned up, was very surprised) and now have more Chinese friends than I've had in ... years.  And this is ironic because SF is 1/3 Asian but the ones I do know are pretty much fully acculturated.

So here I am reminded yet again that I am neither here nor there.  The Chinese friends have to switch to broken English to communicate with this girl here who looks perfectly Chinese but can only understand slightly and definitely not speak the language, they hang on tightly to their roots while I'm virtually culture-neutral, they actively seek and feel at home with people from their background while I feel generally out of place in either situation.

Don't get me wrong, I love my Asian roots, I love my Asian food, I'm proud of my country in many ways and still call it home.  But I embrace parts of where I am right now and have adapted to where I am in multiple ways, and can adapt back to an extent whenever the situation calls for it.  It's an internal struggle of feeling authentic and wondering who I would be if ever dropped into in a vacuum of context.

*1279 - faux hangover

Danced the night away until an absurd hour in the morning (absurd for my aging body, that is), which also woke me up ridiculously early this morning, such that I feel like I have a bad hangover even though no alcohol was imbibed last night.  Need a long soak in the bath today.

Returning from two weeks in Italy has been a rude awakening.  Plunged straight back into work with a long-lasting cold to boot.  But yes, it was as lovely as you would imagine it to be! :)

*1278 - from Venice

Testing out mobile blogging while in Italy. Wonder how this picture is going to turn out:

Imagine living in the rolling hills of Tuscany! What a different lifestyle. Market research? Wha...? What kind of obscure lifelong dream is that?? Here, you own a little b&b, produce wines, grow herbs, eat cheese, pluck olives, live simply.

We are now on the outskirts of Venice, after spending time in Rome and Tuscany. Tomorrow D joins the 'rents and I, and we explore Venice for real. I think it will be lovely. All the places we have visited so far have been so different, with so much character.