*1152 - under one roof

The problem with cohabiting is that when you have a tiff and need to get away, there's nowhere to escape.  Unless you happen to be on a plane to Arkansas on business like I happen to be.

But then it makes you realise that the very fact that you're living with this person is a promise in itself to put an honest effort into smoothing every kink out.  There's no running away whenever you feel like it; you have to brace yourself and face everything bravely and squarely.  And then you also realise that you chose to live together for a pretty damn good reason that's probably worth fighting for.  And then you also realise that you have the biggest fights you've ever had in your life just because of how important this person is to you--you wouldn't fight so hard to make it work if it didn't matter that much.

Being in a relationship is a funny thing because suddenly you have to deal with a whole new extension of yourself that isn't actually you--it's someone completely different and separate whom you now for some reason regard as a reflection of yourself.  It would be easy enough if you were a puppet master and had control over him like the way you have control over yourself.  But the truth is, you don't, so you have to work at molding each other, delicately and gently instead of angrily and hurtfully, into the perfect form that you can accept wholly and display absolutely proudly because everything you are is a reflection of his values and decisions and compromises and choices and everything he is is yours. Some things can't be fixed even over time and that's why you have to fall in love with the right person in the first place who at the fundamental, unchangeable level is perfect but chances are, there are other things beyond that you wish were different.  But that's okay because no one is perfect all around and this only means you are helping each other become better people.

Missing you already.