*545 - pls pls pls pls

What I really wanted to tell you was that it was so warm (10 degrees?) today that I nearly forgot to wear a coat to school, and the sky was pink and purple and perfect when the sun set, and I watched a movie in class instead of having discussions, and I danced my heart out and nekkid acrobatic boy danced with knives and landed on his nose and bled, and I finally ate dinner with the Singaporeans again after about a month of not seeing them, and, and, and, today was a beautiful day, and yesterday too, and I came home and cried, because it was a beautiful day, and you know why I'm crying. I wouldn't have mentioned the crying part (if I even got as far as that), but I guess you knew, the blubbering idiot that I am, that I had been and I was and I am crying, and I don't even know what to do what to think what to believe what to hold on to anymore, and I wish I could rewind and start over and pick up my phone to tell you how beautiful my day was and stop right there, so that you would think I'm a brave, strong girl, full of rainbows and smiles and more rainbows, but it's not that easy being brave and strong and full of rainbows and smiles and more rainbows.